Rabbit Hole Radio

We do not know where Su-tzu Hsiin came from, but in Eastern Han times he visited Lo-yang and the highest officers there. He brought only one clipper of wine and a strip of meat to entertain in a score of places, for which he apologized, saying, “I have come from afar and these are poor supplies for entertainment. But I hope they will show my deep respect.” Several hundred persons shared table with him; they all drank and ate the entire day without lack.

When he departed, everyone saw a white cloud arise, which lasted from morning to night. At that time one centenarian claimed that when he was young, he had seen Hsiin selling botanicals in the K'uai-chi marketplace and he appeared then much as he did now.

Hsiin was not happy living in Lo-yang and soon left. During the Cheng-shih reign period, in Ch'ang-an near the wall by the Eastern Embankment someone once saw him together with an aged gentleman rubbing a brass figurine of a man. The other old one said to Hsiin, WI watched them cast this bronze, nearly five hundred years ago.” The onlooker called out, 'Mr. Su, sir, please tarry a moment,” and hurried to intercept him. Hsiin did not appear to be traveling swiftly, but the man could not overtake him even on a galloping horse.

Gallipoli, August 28, 1915.

The following is an account of a strange incident that happened…in the morning, during the severest and final days of the fighting, which took place at “Hill 60,” Suvla Bay, “ANZAC” [Australian and New Zealand Army Corps].

The day broke clear, without a cloud in sight, as any beautiful Mediterranean day could be expected to be. The exception, however, was a number of perhaps six or eight “loaf of bread” shaped clouds—all shaped exactly alike—which were hovering over “Hill 60.” It was noticed that, in spite of a four or five mile an hour breeze from the south, these clouds did not alter their position in any shape or form, nor did they drift away under the influence of the breeze. They were hovering at an elevation of about 60 degrees as seen from our observation point 500 ft. up. Also stationary and resting on the ground right underneath this group of clouds was a similar cloud in shape, measuring about 800 ft. in length, 200 ft. in height, and 200 ft. in width. This cloud was absolutely dense, almost solid looking in structure, and positioned about 14 to 18 chains from the fighting in British held territory. All this was observed by twenty-two men of No. 3 Section of No. 1 Field Company, N.Z.E., including myself, from our trenches on Rhododendron Spur, approximately 2500 yards south west of the cloud on the ground. Our vantage point was overlooking “Hill 60” by about 300 ft. As it turned out later, this singular cloud was straddling a dry creek bed or sunken road (Kaiajik Dere) and we had a perfect view of the cloud’s sides and ends as it rested on the ground. Its colour was a light grey, as was the colour of the other clouds.

A British Regiment, the First Fourth Norfolk, of several hundred men, was then noticed marching up this sunken road or creek towards “Hill 60.” It appeared as though they were going to reinforce the troops at “Hill 60.” However, when they arrived at this cloud, they marched straight into it, with no hesitation, but no one ever came out to deploy and fight at “Hill 60.” About an hour later, after the last of the file had disappeared into it, this cloud very unobtrusively lifted off the ground and, like any fog or cloud would, rose slowly until it joined the other similar clouds which were mentioned in the beginning of this account. On viewing them again, they all looked alike “as peas in a pod.” All this time, the group of clouds had been hovering in the same place, but as soon as the singular “ground” cloud had risen to their level, they all moved away northwards, i.e. towards Thrace (Bulgaria). In a matter of about three-quarters of an hour they had all disappeared from view.

The Regiment mentioned is posted as “missing” or “wiped out” and on Turkey surrendering in 1918, the first thing Britain demanded of Turkey was the return of this regiment. Turkey replied that she had neither captured this Regiment, nor made contact with it, and did not know that it existed. A British Regiment in 1914-18 consisted of any number between 800 and 4000 men. Those who observed this incident vouch for the fact that Turkey never captured that Regiment, nor made contact with it.

We, the undersigned, although late in time, that is at the 50th Jubilee of the ANZAC landing, declare that the above described incident is true in every word.

Signed by witnesses:

4/165 Sapper F. Reichart
Matata, Bay of Plenty

13/416 Sapper R. Newnes
157 King St., Cambridge

J. L. Newman
73 Freyberg St.,
Otumoetai, Tauranga.

“The door refused to open. It said, “Five cents, please.”

He searched his pockets. No more coins; nothing.

“I’ll pay you tomorrow,” he told the door. Again he tried the knob. Again it remained locked tight.

“What I pay you,” he informed it, “is in the nature of a gratuity; I don’t have to pay you.”

“I think otherwise,” the door said. “Look in the purchase contract you signed when you bought this conapt.”

In his desk drawer he found the contract; since signing it he had found it necessary to refer to the document many times. Sure enough; payment to his door for opening and shutting constituted a mandatory fee. Not a tip.

“You discover I’m right,” the door said. It sounded smug.

From the drawer beside the sink Joe Chip got a stainless steel knife; with it he began systematically to unscrew the bolt assembly of his apt’s money-gulping door.

“I’ll sue you,” the door said as the first screw fell out.

Joe Chip said, “I’ve never been sued by a door. But I guess I can live through it.”